I Remain Lucky

My mother once said that when everything is on fire, you should take a second to appreciate the things that you have that are going well. Today is Valentine’s Day, so I’m going to give that a shot, because truly everything is aflame. Alas, I remain lucky.

My mother may have passed on, but my father and my sister remain at my side for as long as the universe will grace me with their precious souls. I am lucky that I have the two of them. I am lucky I have the kiddos, whom I adore and will fiercely fight for until the end of my time here on Earth. I am lucky that I get to say my 92 year old grandmother is still walking this planet, even if she does need a cane to do it. I am grateful that last week I was not sick on Wednesday night and I was able to go and read poetry, and I WILL be grateful next week, when I conquer a big week at work, because I know I am capable. I am grateful that my sickness only disrupts my life for a couple of days at a time instead of everyday. I am grateful for my home, and the comforts that remain inside it, that I am so lucky to have in a time when so many have so little. I am even grateful for my raggedy little SUV, with the big dent in the door but the engine that keeps on chugging.

I am grateful for my friends in ways that I did not know I could be grateful. Since Mom died, I have relied on them much more than I have in the past- if I did not have Sahar, if I did not have Beth or Kevin, if I did not have Carey or Chelsea or Jamie, I do not know where I would be. This morning, I texted Sahar and said Happy Valentine’s Day to the year’s real MVP, and I mean it. Even my husband knows the truth- my friends have been my kingdom.

And, my husband. I am so lucky to have someone whose face lights up when they see me, every time. Every time he sees me walking to a room, or come out of the kitchen with my coffee, he looks at me like it is the first time all over again. Mark is my diamond in the rough, my little Aladdin, and to many he may not seem like a precious jewel, but I assure you that is not the case. I am deeply lucky to have a person who loves me as much as Mark does. I know it is rare, and I am grateful.

Everything may be on fire, but so is the love that I have.  Happy Valentine’s Day.