Everything, of course, is garbage. Meaning, everything I write; meaning, complete hamster-cage liner. I mean, yeah, I know that’s not true; just let me have this meltdown for a moment, ok?
So, October is coming up pretty quick, huh? Many things are going on in October for me, like moving to a new apartment, my husband’s 40th birthday (E has a b-day, too,) my first weekend running the shop on my own, at least one trip out to Erie to see mom, and Halloween/my sister’s birthday, wherein she turns 26 and I finally live in a neighborhood that hands out candy. Also…poetry night, featuring yours truly. Clearly, we are going to talk about that, since I started this post by telling you all of my writing is garbage. Hot, stinky trash.
Nope, that’s just me psyching myself out. I know what I want to do: a couple of pieces from, A Lovely Wreckage…gotta sell those books. A piece from the yet to be picked up (Un)Requited. Maybe VII from Me and Jesus etc. Some outliers…the ones I really like that I haven’t read yet. And maybe The Squirrel, and Halloween…y’know, because…Halloween.
See, I know what I’ll read, and I know I’ll read well. I don’t have the panic I had a few years back. Still, old habits die real hard, and I find myself judging my work through my most critical eye-which I despise, of course. I thought that my imposter syndrome was dead and gone, at least at the level of writing I have achieved. This is new, however…being a featured reader. I get like 15-17 minutes or something crazy when I’m used to doing 3-6 minutes at a time. I’m going to have to figure out timing on my performance as well.
Anyway, that’s what I’m going to go work on during this rainy Monday afternoon. If you’re here in the area on October 28th around 6pm, do drop in and hear me read. On one hand, I want to pack the place. On the other hand, I’d like no one to show up at all, besides the regulars I am already comfortable sharing with. But it would be nice, I think, to see some familiar friends in the crowd. So come on down to Dog Ears, and I’ll read you a poem about a squirrel.