I have done quite a bit of reading over the last two days, in preparation for something I will tell you about later on. By later on, I do not mean later on in this blog post-I mean later in the week. You will just have to follow my Twitter or Facebook @hamneggs716 if you want “breaking news.”
Anyway. I did a lot of reading. I am straight-up forcing myself, from here on out. Unfortunately for me, my eyes are not doing well with my books. I went to the eye doc, and they, for reasons I cannot fathom, forgot to give me bifocals. I’m supposed to have bifocals. Instead, I have glasses that help my driving significantly, but with which I can’t read a damn thing.
Unless it is on my computer screen.
I was browsing a lit mag the other day and realized I truly have no problem reading on the computer screen. It is the perfect distance away. So why am I not reading everything on my computer?!
It was an inspirational moment. Also, a convenient one. Why was I trying to read my books by holding them up to my nose? Why was I trying to read poetry journals on my phone, squinting at it with my glasses atop my head? Stupid, stupid girl. You could have just been here in your office, comfortable and at good distance, and read anything you want.
But…to my left…
Oh, they are sad. They are looking at me, all the tomes I have collected over the years, and they are crying, because their spines may never be cracked again. My books are my #1 possessions…ok, besides my teddy bear, Honey Joe…#2. I can’t get rid of them, but I also can’t read them right now. It makes me sad. In turn…they are sad. I can feel it. Books are alive, y’know.
So, I did some reading. I finished that lit mag. Then I read three short stories, all on my computer. With comfortable eyeballs.
Listen, this may not be a big deal to some but it’s a big deal to me. Just another step in the healing process. Today I said to Kev that I hadn’t been to the retina doc in a long time, which was weird, because I used to go once a month or so for my eyeball shot. I am so happy that’s no longer part of my routine. I am so happy to see, even if they didn’t give me bifocals. I’ll read, a lot in the coming days, actually, and I will do it on my computer. But while I do, I will sit beside the books I love so much and wish for next year when my insurance gives me another eye doc appointment and I can get bifocals.
It’s for this reason I’m grateful so much reading can be done in a digital space now, well and also because my bookshelves can only hold so much. I know it’s not quite the same experience, though. Hang in there!
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